“In great deeds something abides. On great fields something stays. Forms change and pass; bodies disappear, but spirits linger, to consecrate ground for the vision-place of souls. And reverent men and women from afar, and generations that know us not and that we know not of, heart-drawn to see where and by whom great things were suffered and done for them, shall come to this deathless field to ponder and dream; And lo! the shadow of a mighty presence shall wrap them in its bosom, and the power of the vision pass into their souls.”
Joshua L. Chamberlain - 1889 at the dedication of the 20th Maine monument
Gosh, this quote from Chamberlain leaves me not wanting to write at all about this run, because it says it all. But running for veteran suicide awareness, I suppose there is always a story to tell. I was disappointed to DNF the two races I attempted in September but it felt like serendipity, this #27 run landing on the week of Dexter's 27th birthday. He loved war history and especially the Civil War & Revolutionary War, so it felt really special to honor him @ Gettysburg. I also found out it was the last place that Sgt Gray visited before his death, so it was just meant to be. When my daughter wanted to fly out to Virginia this autumn, and wanted to crew a run while visiting, we decided Gettysburg PA would be the place to run. Beautiful, quiet and solemn, an appropriate place to run for fallen heroes. It felt like a run not only for the boys I run with but also for the estimated 50,000 casualties there.
Its difficult to express the emotions of being at Gettysburg and how it felt being out on the battlefield. I'd just watched the movie Gettysburg with my family, and the bravery, and horrors of this terrible battle were still fresh in my head.

I was so happy to have my daughter and grand baby Ellie in town to warm my heart and to help crew my run! I was planning to start running Sunday morning but Saturday night we realized I had an appointment with my surgeon 10:30 am Monday morning, so without much more than a 20 minute nap, I had to drive up to Gettysburg to begin running at midnight to finish in time to get home for that, so overnight both Saturday and Sunday nights. Thank goodness for caffeine! . This photo was about 10:15 pm dressed and driving up to Gettysburg to leave a drop bag in the bushes at Little round top, then drive to the opposite side of the battlefield to begin my run.

There were signs up that the battlefield was closed from sunset to sunrise, so I was a bit hesitant and nervous about it, but I parked near a campground that had an unmarked trail around the edge of the battlefield and decided to run on that. After a few miles it meanders onto and around the battlefield. I felt a little guilty but at the same time it felt right to be there alone in the dark, honoring heroes. I wasn't doing anything to diminish the sacredness of the place so civil disobedience was the order for the night. The battlefield was completely dark and but with half the moon out I was able to run without a headlamp quietly and alone in the dark and I figured nobody would even know or notice. 2 or 3 times when I was on the public open roads going through the battlefield a car would come, so I'd jump off the road and hide in a shadow, or lay down in the grass. I didn't want anyone to see me even on the road. I only saw one police car. It was tense but exhilarating, sneaking across moonlit battlefields where there are rumors of ghosts, thinking of all the men who lost their lives there. Ghost in the trenches song playing, I felt pretty bad a$$. ha!
"Under fire, a ghost that roams the battlefield"
I felt perfectly safe, knowing I have a couple US Marine angels to fend of any unsavory spirits. :) The law abiding side of me was watching the time, eager for sunrise when I could run openly. The hours in the dark were incredible though. Listened to some appropriate music quietly, light off, trying to not trip on the trail in the dark. I got lost and turned around a few times so I didn't really plan any real direction to run, just explored the dark trails and a few roads. I did roughly 15 mi of trails then realized it was taking me too long in the dark so I switched to the roads. . Luckily it was only a little bit technical in a few places where I was forced to briefly turn my headlamp on.
The most memorable time was climbing to Little Round Top and overlooking the whole battlefield in moonlight. Solemn, hallowed, mournful, sacred, peaceful... it did not feel eerie or scary or haunted to me. I only felt peace and goodness and sadness at the loss of life. It was very surreal. As I descended from Little Round Top I heard a large hooting owl and felt a tingle of presence and thought of my friend Nate, it felt like a sign that he was with me and watching out for my safety. I ended up climbing that hill 8-10 times. I did have one scary moment, I was almost back to my car which I was using as an aid station about every 10 miles. I was right around the Virginia Monument on the confederate line, near the site of Pickett's charge. On the trail in the dark I suddenly hears a mans voice yell out. I guessed it was as close as 50 yards away and got a chill down my spine. I stopped and looked through the trees to the road, thinking I'd see some college boys out horsing around, but there was no sign of anyone. I made a hard left turn down a dirt road and tiptoed silently in the grass, and pulled out my knife and pepper spray. I went about half a mile then slowly headed back, praying I'd be safe. I told Dexter he needed to protect me, and I felt less afraid. I looked through the trees at the road and surrounding areas but never saw anything out in the woods. I thought perhaps it was a coyote howl or something... I tried to not think of it as a ghost, but it sounded much more like a mans voice than any animal. I circled around the battlefield once more before dawn and from the lookout at Little Round Top, I heard 3 or 4 shouts of the same yell coming from the Virginia line in the distance. I thought...that has to be coyotes. ?? :-O I was relieved when the dawn came!

The quiet white sunrise seemed appropriate for Sunday morning. I was listening to folksy church hymns and feeling close to the spirit and to my sweet son. Also feeling an appreciation and recognition of the holy ground I was on. The autumn colors were so beautiful. At sunrise a few people started showing up, and I had a little conversation with a couple veterans about the battlefield and my running. It was so heartbreaking looking at these quiet beautiful fields and seeing the cannons, imagining the loss of life, Americans killing Americans. It was very sobering. :( Especially the sight of Pickett's charge. I could just imagine the confederate soldiers being mowed down as they tried to climb the fences. :(
There was so much to see, but I only stopped to snap a few pictures. They don't do the experience justice, at all.





My family met me around 50k! I was so happy to see them! They were planning to tour the battlefield and meet me periodically through the day. Especially cute little Ellie who just learned to say gramma! :-D I was still feeling pretty good.

Have a bunch of pics from all the times I went up Little Round Top and down into Devils Den. It never got old.





Devils Den down behind me.

Jogging into town to meet Jason at the motel. Jason picked me up a delicious Big Mac for lunch! I was around 40 mi in.

Quick loop through the National Cemetery where the union soldiers were buried, 1000 in nameless graves. :(



The site of Chamberlain's bayonet charge was probably my favorite place to visit. Imagining the rebel troops charging uphill through the trees, the 20th Maine out of ammunition, charging downhill straight into the advancing troops with their bayonets, successfully holding the hill. Its an amazing story of bravery and it felt so special to be there.


Defensive wall from the battle.

Bullet holes in the trees. Amazing.

Pennsylvania Memorial @ the Union line along Cemetery Ridge. Stunning in the daytime and incredible by moonlight. "They shall beat their swords into plowshares"

The sun came out in the late afternoon as I was heading towards Big Round Top to hit 50 miles. Passed the Alabama monument and thought of Sgt Wilson's family who live in Alabama.

A little ways ahead of me a car pulled over and a pretty girl hopped out and started walking towards me. I thought at first it was someone coming to ask about what I was running for, and then I noticed a boot cast and a smile that I recognized! I was completely surprised and overjoyed that Nate's sister Sally and her husband Josh has driven up from West Virginia to come out and meet me on the battlefield to show their support. I literally cried, it meant so much to me! I told her about the owl I heard on Little Round Top and she said when they arrived in the daytime, a large owl came swooping by. It was just so cool and moving and we both felt & knew Nate was along for the run. She's so funny, she has her broken foot in a boot and I had my knee brace, & we went hobbling quickly up the Big Round Top hill for a mile or two together. She lost her brother not long after we lost Dexter and we've supported each other through difficult days of grief. Though Nate wasn't a Marine, I feel like hes something special and always feel like I need to carry him with me when I'm running. I don't think its chance that Sally and I became friends. Shes so special and I just felt so loved!! It gave me so much encouragement. My brain was kindof fried and my legs and feet were really starting to hurt by this time but seeing her made me determined to finish well. <3 I love you Sally & Josh! (& Nate Dogg!)

Not long after I left Sally, I hit the 50 mile mark climbing up Little Round Top again. The afternoon sun on the autumn leaves in the forest was stunning. I started thinking about SSgt Taylor Wilson's family who was doing an Out of Darkness Suicide Prevention walk in Taylor's memory this same day. Out of the blue I just got floored with the biggest feeling of love. It felt like giant friendly arms were wrapped around me and I just felt so grateful to know Taylor's family and I prayed that they would have a meaningful walk and feel their husband and daddy with them. It just felt like a big thank you and that moment made all the miles worth every discomfort.

I loved descending down into Devils Den. Imagining the steep climb the soldiers had while trying to take the hill, and the vicious bloody battle that took place among the rocks was just
so sad and moving. I quietly ran through here just trying to think about and honor the soldiers and trying to picture the sights and sounds of what that battle must have looked like in the maze of boulders. The site of fierce fighting and heavy casualties. One swampy section of land is called "slaughter pen" for how many soldiers from both sides were gunned down in crossfire.



Beautiful sunset!


Sunset over the battlefield.

I met my family around mile 58 & 68. My feet were really hurting so I took time to change out my shoes both times & take off my socks and rub some voltarin into my feet. I was so relieved to finally get to a remaining 50k, but it still felt so long having 32 miles to go. I decided rather than wandering the battlefield I would do a straight out and back in the evening -1am ish, to get 12 miles out of the way. I knew once I was down to 20 miles left it would put the end in sight and Id get some fresh energy! Jason picked me up a dairy queen chicken sandwich, globs of mayo dripping out were disgusting but the real food tasted great! To this point I mostly fueled on capri suns, electrolytes, applesauce and carnation breakfast drinks with some handfuls of candy. The 6 miles out of town was long and I got so exhausted that I just wanted to sleep. I saw this road sign that helped me keep the end goal in sight!

Jason met me at my turnaround and I laid back in the car for 5 minutes trying to get a catnap. After he left I was still so tired, I laid down behind a fence in the dirt and slept for maybe 10 minutes. It was enough to wake me up to get me back into town. Had on a jacket to stay warm and ran again without a headlamp under the moonlight. Coming back into town I was glad to be back onto the familiar roads of the battlefield. Back at the hotel at 80 miles Adam came out to walk/run with me! I was so excited, he's never really come out to pace me before, but the draw of sneaking onto the battlefield at night was too much to resist haha. Not sure I was setting a very good example. :-D I had so much fun with him, we only did 4 miles together before his feet and shins were hurting, but we were listening to Sabaton music and singing together, and talking about the battle. Adam loves war history so it was really great being out with him. I wanted to show him the moonlit view from Little Round Top. Other than that we stayed mostly on the public roads. Jason and Hannah drove out to meet us at 84 miles and Hannah ran 6 with me, finishing around 4 am. We didn't feel like talking much, we listening to the music and talked a little about the intense feeling being out on the battlefield. We went up onto Little Round Top to also see the view with the moon, and then ran down through Devils Den which was a little creepy and haunted and sad at night. My feet hurt sooo much, if we were talking I was complaining about my feet. :-P Going past the wheat field and the peach orchard under the moonlight was also just a cool experience. We saw one tree I swear was the shape of a giant gorilla. The monuments in the fields in the moonlight looked like figures standing vigil out in the darkness. It was eerie and beautiful but not really scary. It was so awesome being out with my sweet girl, who flew across the country just to do these miles with me. <3 <3 <3 I'm so blessed by all her love and support!! We did our last mile together through town, then I was on my own for the last 10 miles.

I was glad when the sunrise came again and cars started to appear on the roads. Every step was painful at this point, it felt like I was running on shards of glass. Also had a bad crick in my neck that was killing me. I only had a little bit of nausea but gulped down a couple 16 oz bottles of liquid IV and getting rehydrated got rid of the nausea. Got back to the hotel at 99 miles, ha, so I crossed the street and did my last mile in the National Cemetery and hit 100 miles at the Lincoln Gettysburg address monument. That was just so cool and the perfect finish line. I absolutely love Abraham Lincoln This whole experience just brought the whole Civil War to life and I reflected many times on how as Americans, we need to stop increasing the division among us and instead look for ways to resolve our conflicts and bring peace. A civil war should never happen again. Felt so much love for my son and appreciation for his love of this history. I think, though I cant express it well, that this was my most meaningful run to date.
On a strange side note, I looked up the sound of Gettysburg coyotes on youtube after my run, trying to identify the yell/yells I heard. Instead I stumbled on something I've never heard of...the "Rebel yell" somewhat like a coyote but distinctly male human voice in the call. I could swear that was what I heard at 2-3am on the Virginia confederate line. :-O
Was it spirits of confederate soldiers that I heard? Who know!. Gives me major goosebumps thinking about it though!
Finish Line!

The kids were asleep but Peter came out with Jason to Congratulate me and help me hobble to the car.


"In a larger sense, we can not dedicate -- we can not consecrate -- we can not hallow -- this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us -- that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion -- that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain -- that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom -- and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.
Abraham Lincoln November 19, 1863

My crew!

My crazy meandering course





On a side note, after consulting with a new surgeon, I found I should be able to have a partial knee replacement and continue running after 2-3 months of healing. That was a real relief after the news I had last month when the other surgeon said I had to stop running. I can keep doing 100s with these gosleeve compression sleeves and a hinged brace to stabilize and reduce impact of the bone on bone until my PKR. Jason bought me a cool bumper sticker for my car that seemed appropriate! I added the 100. ;)

Well, the internet ate my previous comment. So let me just say, another tug-on-the-heart-strings race report Rosie! Congrats on #27 for Dexter (et al). Must be really amazing to run through such hallowed ground all night long without lights (twice). And what an amazing photo montage of your run -- great combo of words and pictures!
Sorry to hear about the pain in your feet (and a bit surprised it was not your knee); perhaps due to running mechanics compensation? Also interesting about hearing the man's voice/coyote howls/rebel yell? Pretty spooky!
Glad you got better news regarding your knee from the second opinion. Best of luck with your PKR surgery and recovery. Do you know what parts are getting replac…